Moving house, negotiating hurdles
Moving to a new home
Negotiating hurdles is one way to describe buying and selling the family home. We had lived in the house for 25 years, selling it was a difficult but obvious decision for many reasons.
Negotiating hurdles
When MS forced me into medical retirement in January 2012 me and MrsB knew it was only a matter of time before we would have to sell the house we had bought in 1999. Minimal income and a mortgage do not make happy bedfellows. In summer 2022 we finally pulled our heads out of the sand and started the think about selling the house.
Selling the family home
In October we put our Victorian terraced house on the market. The estate agents were hopeless so we sacked them. We tried again with different estate agents after Christmas and got some offers. We accepted the one that looked sensible. Now the fun really began, downsizing.
Victorian terraced houses might not look big but they have plenty of storage space. Both MrsB and myself will not throw something away if there is any chance it might be useful another day. We were still waiting for our first grandchild so keeping anything remotely child friendly in the spacious loft was obligatory. A daily trip to the Oxfam bookshop and a charity shop did make a small dent in the pile of unwanted items. Disposing of 4 double beds plus sheets and towels was a different matter.
Contracts were exchanged and we agreed a completion date, 21 July 2023, then only weeks away. We had decided to rent a flat in Woolwich Arsenal, it would not be ideal but gave us a chance to decide on the next step. The big removal van took books pictures, furniture, and clothes into storage. A baby van took the basics into the flat. Part one successfully completed but the next stages would be more difficult.
The flat in Woolwich
It was not ideal for a disabled person but we survived. It gave us a base while we thought about the next step. Our daughter in Woolwich was going to move to the Southend area but the house sale fell through. She and her husband suggested buying a property with us. They would live in the main house and we would live in an annexe. This idea ticked a lot of boxes.
An ideal place
We all looked at a house in Faversham in February 2024, it looked ideal. We made an offer that was accepted, another hurdle crossed. There was no chain so we anticipated moving to the new property within 3 months. It was all proceeding smoothly. Then just three days before exchange of contracts the solicitors handling the purchase of my daughter’s flat pulled out. The lease on our rented flat expired in 9 weeks and new solicitors were needed to complete the deal. Suddenly the stakes got higher and stress was off the scale.
The good news
New solicitors successfully completed the sale of their flat 10 days before the lease on our flat expired. The vendors of the house we were buying were extrem
ely patient. It was stressful for everyone but we moved into the annexe in Faversham with 3 days to spare on our lease. The bathroom in the annexe then had to be completely replaced so two months without a shower and pissing in a bucket for me. Now we are about to totally replace the kitchen.
Looking back
I miss the Grand Union canal which went through the town we left, Berkhamsted. We had lived there for over 40 years. I now have no desire to return there.
Looking ahead
Faversham is a very old town, largely untouched so there are steps into over half the shops, terrible for wheelchair and mobility scooter users. We never anticipated living at the same address as our daughter, husband and grandson until seven months before it occurred. Another grandchild this summer, exciting times. The house is close to the railway station with regular trains to London. The house has a lovely garden and ideal in so many ways. The garage is still full of removers boxes waiting to be unpacked but we had finally moved to a new place. Too much negotiating of hurdles and stress as far as I was concerned. Hopefully we will never have to move again. Now we just need to turn our small annexe into a home.
November 2024
How are you finding the transition of your healthcare Patrick? Here it’s been very difficult – the technology of the two trusts don’t talk to each other. I’ve by passed the GP and gone straight to the MS nurses – provision very goid
Hello Patricia,
I hope I have got the name right.
My MS consultant retired last year from clinical work (ProfG) so I have had to start from afresh and that coincided exactly with the move to Kent. I’m only entitled to one 15 minute appointment a year. I’ve spoken to my new neurologist via a telephone appointment, unimpressed is the best description. I have an appointment with an MS Nurse sometime next year.
I feel very cut off. Luckily I have retained contact with the specialists such as bladder, walking etc who are based in Queen Square and attached to UCL
I know my GP notes have been transferred but MS notes are a total mystery. It sounds as if you have quite a good grip on things.
Talk soon
Glad you are finally in one spot. It will work out. Many hurdles seem to be the case for those of us seeking and doing the sane thing. Our disabilities are also not often understood by others. My extended family think I am “fine” but I know I am not. I am downsizing a 2 bedroom apartment with garage and doing it with one hand on a cane is tough. Or both on a walker, depending upon the day. I was lucky to find a small narrow 2 shelf bar cart that fits my hallway so I can trundle stuff from the bedroom to the living room so I can bag it to take out to donate. Easier. Getting it down the outside stairs is tougher. 14 steps. One handed again or slide in a box or roll the bags. I just keep the mantra going: never a dull moment! Good luck to us all!
Hello Alison,
It sounds like you are having a tough time. Can you not get someone from your extended family to help. It will work out.
Just got to keep on going with a smile. Good luck
Moving home is challenging full stop. For so many reasons – financial, physical & psychological – add MS into the mix & it’s horrendous!
So, glad you made it.
And hope you settle brilliantly into your new home.
And what lovely news to be welcoming a new grandchild into your life too.
Enjoy x
Hello Katie,
Yup, moving is a nightmare. My wife, MrsB has been a complete hero. Without her it would have been impossible.
Living in same property although separate residences from my daughter is absolutely fantastic. Reuniting the family is great and beyond my wildest dreams